Being Unwell

Since surgery I have been convalescing at my best friends who is amazing. He has been so patient with the kids and myself even though we have invaded his space. The breast area is painful sometimes and not at other times. The drain, which is a tube going from my back to a bottle is uncomfortable and limits movement especially when you try to sleep. As a result, sleep has been limited and I do feel very tired a lot of the time. I have to inform the nurses of the level of liquid that is being accumulated in the bottle each day and on Friday the amount was less than 20 milliliters’. The nurse told me to observe it over the weekend and if the amount remains low then they would remove the drain on Monday. That would be great because then I might be able to get some sleep. The Beast from the East has prevented me from being able to go out because I was told the warmer the chest area remains the quicker it was likely to heal. Not to mention the fact I am unable to drive for 2 weeks. So, I did not want to risk it by going out in the cold for any prolonged period of time. I did leave the house earlier in the week to go to Marks with a dear friend who came to visit and that was nice but really cold. She was not impressed with my warm coat. I am lucky that I am not one of those commuters stuck somewhere on their way to work.

I have not had to take any of the codeine that I left the hospital with, mainly because the pain has been manageable but yesterday I not only leaned on the tubing which then pulled in my back but I also caught it in several places as well as forget it was attached to me at one point, causing the bottle to crash on the floor. The breast care nurse had already told me the bottles were durable and not to worry about them falling. I have been given anti-biotics and I am taking paracetamols as and when needed. I have been very low over the last 12 hours or so and so I took to writing to figure out why and this is my conclusion;

Control

They take away my dignity

With a flimsy hospital gown.

They take away my femininity

And remove a cancerous growth.

They take away my nicotine

When desperation requires a smoke.

They take away my immortality

Reminding me life is short.

They take away my freedom

And imprison me in this snow.

They take away my movement

With a drain stuck in my back.

They take away my choices

And feed me all that is good.

They take and take and take

Until my wings became broke.